However, with all the information flying around there, you’re bound to occasionally learn something you wish you hadn’t about a friend or family member (and I’m not even referring to the health conditions that some people apparently feel are worth a status update).  I recently learned that someone I’ve known since childhood is against gay marriage, and I’ve been really wrestling with how to address the subject ever since that dastardly little tidbit popped up in my News Feed.

Even though this person isn’t someone that I regularly see, and so I’m not exceedingly hurt by their position, I definitely believe on many levels that it’s my responsibility to say something.  First of all, I consider being GLBT something to celebrate, and I believe we should always speak our truths.  Secondly, I think that the only real way people who discriminate against us will ever change their minds is through personal contact, and as such I choose to be an ambassador for the GLBT community if the opportunity comes up.  It gets harder to discriminate against an entire section of the population if that section is made up of faces and names, especially faces and names that are familiar and well-liked.

So, what to say to this person, and when, and how?  I know that they’re much more likely to be receptive to my message if I keep it private, so I’m resisting the temptation to comment on the post that alerted me to their position, instead choosing to send an email or a private message.  Since it’s been about four days, enough of my initial anger has evaporated that I think I can strike the appropriate tone: a gentle but direct statement that expresses both my disappointment and my hope for change.

We all have different opinions on how to deal with this particular issue, I’m sure, but I feel confident of one thing: all of us (and our lovely allies)  never waver in describing our engagements and our marriages as the amazing, life-changing blessings that they are…  and just knowing that’s the case helps renew my faith that the truth of the matter will come around one day.

On this table we had cHill Weddings, Outvite, It’s About Time, Closed Circle Photography, and Modern Ketubah.

At our next table we had StinkerPants Design, Turn Loose the Art, Turtle Love Committee, and Charmed Places.

Thank you to ALL our vendors who sent in things to display at Pride!

Image via Wikimedia Commons

While it’s true that I am ridiculously excited by the prospect of registering – and a little bit intimidated too; how do I decide between Egyptian cotton or Supima? Will I ever really use a pressure cooker? – I am also enjoying the less material gifts that planning my wedding has bestowed upon me.

I live in a very liberal state, Prop 8 notwithstanding, and an extremely liberal area within that state. But at work I was faced with an unstated policy that sexuality was not something that should ever be discussed openly. I had two coworkers, both of whom I was certain were gay, who wouldn’t refer to their partners even when the conversation warranted it. I needed the job so I kept my mouth shut. It was easy for a while because I wasn’t dating anyone. But then I met Liz and I wanted to sing my happiness from every rooftop.

I began to discuss “my girlfriend” whenever possible, but those who wanted to could easily translate that into “female friend.” It wasn’t until I showed up at work with a diamond engagement ring on and began discussing wedding plans that people finally began to acknowledge my relationship for what it was. And some, clearly, had some issues with it. But I am delighted to report that with my growing excitement has come growing acceptance. And also the discovery that more of my coworkers were gay than I’d previously even guessed at. As soon as I began to openly discuss my relationship and wedding, they began crawling out of their closets.

My happiest moment came a few weeks ago when a colleague whom I’d previously guessed might be gay or bisexual, but then had mentioned her husband during one casual conversation, suddenly admitted to me that her husband was actually… her wife. They had, sadly, not had the time nor the money to get married during the brief period during which it was legal in my state, but they are planning a big shindig with lots and lots of dancing once Prop 8 is overturned. We recently had a grand time discussing venues and wedding attire while smiling from ear to ear.

Harvey Milk said, “I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.” I am thankful that my wedding has given me that opportunity.

Since I was there, I brought along all my stuff for Film Noir Photography too- it felt like I was the official NYC Pride wedding photographer because I was the only wedding photographer actually at Pride! So I got to answer all kinds of questions and show couples, yes, you can have a fun and art school photographer capture your day.

I brought a new mini book to show a lesbian wedding I had done 2 weeks ago and it was a total hit. Everyone kept flipping through it :)

We had several displays about So You’re EnGAYged explaining what we do and trying to help people understand the kind of resource we are becoming.

One of the most popular things was Stinkerpants Design’s bumper sticker. People kept telling me they were going to put it on their desk at work. They loved the illustrations and felt the the bumper sticker was political but cute at the same time!

See all our vendors tomorrow!

Pride Fest Information:
Hudson St. between Abingdon Sq. & West 14th St. and So You’re EnGAYged is booth 25
Sunday, June 28th, 2009, 11:00 AM – 7:00 PM

Turn Loose The Art, Turtle Love Committee, It’s About Time(the only planner in the US dedicated to same-sex wedding planning), cHill weddings, Closed Circle Photography, Film Noir Photography, Katie Fisher Design, Blue Canary Events, Modern Ketubah and more will have material for you to look at, browse, and ask questions about.

We will Have Katie Fisher Design at our booth to help guide you through invitation questions and design help.

Blue Canary Events, an off shoot of Wish Special Events, will be at our booth too to help answer your questions about the whole wedding planning process.

And of course, I’ll be there to help answer any questions you have about wedding photography and how to pick the right photographer for you.

It’s official folks! So You’re EnGAYged will be at NYC Pride with our very own booth!!

Stop by to meet Natalie and Me(Kelly), meet some of our approved vendors, check out materials that have been sent from all across the USA from our approved vendors, get some free stuff and tell us what you think of the site.

Pride Fest Information

Hudson St. between Abingdon Sq. & West 14th St.

Sunday, June 28th, 2009, 11:00 AM – 7:00 PM

Turn Loose The Art, Turtle Love Committee, It’s About Time(the only planner in the US dedicated to same-sex wedding planning), cHill weddings, Closed Circle Photography, Film Noir Photography, Katie Fisher Design, SachaBlue Photography, Blue Canary Events, Modern Ketubah and more will have material for you to look at, browse, and ask questions about.

We will Have Katie Fisher Design at our booth to help guide you through invitation questions and design help.

Blue Canary Events, an off shoot of Wish Special Events, will be at our booth too to help answer your questions about the whole wedding planning process.

And of course, I’ll be there to help answer any questions you have about wedding photography and how to pick the right photographer for you.

Can you tell I’m so excited?!?!?