Real Gay Wedding Stone Ridge Inn New York : Brenda and Chris

The casual, sweet setting of this wedding was captured perfectly by Melissa Schwartz of Organic Photography. Traveling from her California base to New York, Melissa worked her magic.

Our wedding day was everything we wanted it to be and each element of the event was pieced together organically by Chris and I (while living on opposite sides of the world). We loosely followed a traditional wedding ceremony: Brenda wore white and Chris wore black, Brenda’s one niece was a flower girl but she handed out leis, we didn’t have the ‘father’ walk us down the aisle instead we walked out together holding hands and brought all four of our parents up to equally participate in the lei ceremony, there was music but it was the Dixie Chicks’ “Lullaby”-which my friend also played on his acoustic guitar-for us to walk down the aisle and Charles Wright’s Loveland as we exited (there was no “here comes the bride”)

But we also added creativity to the ceremony there by making it our own: at the beginning of the ceremony Brenda’s second niece came up and took both wedding rings and passed them around to each guest to hold them and give the rings a blessing; we ordered orchid leis and Brenda gave each of Chris’ parents a lei to symbolize bringing the family circle together and Chris did the same (NOTE: this also helped Melissa the photographer to know who the parents were), we incorporated the Hindu seven steps into the ceremony inspired by Gandhi and walked around a fire after ever vow, we shared a glass of wine. See the website for our wedding script that includes our vows and explanations.

While there were some last minute things we needed to do the morning of (e.g. Brenda racing to buy Chris a cozy black sweater wrap at Macys and getting herself a camisole and then sewing it to her shirt) we felt really prepared. We had a smallish wedding (80 people), and we made the event something unique by adding in elements important to both of us.

· What was your favorite moment of the day?
The speeches during dinner! Particularly, Chris’ dad welcoming Brenda into the family: “Welcome to my 4th daughter”

· Favorite design element of the day?
Hawaiian leis, inspired by our trip a few months prior to Thailand where orchids can often be found floating in bowls of water. We wore leis around our necks, but also purchased loose flowers and floated them in wooden bowls of water at each dinner table instead of placing a bouquet.

· How did you make your ceremony meaningful for the both of you?
Wrote our own “vows”, incorporated traditions from around the world to
represent cultures & places that have touched us. Used “green” principles when sourcing vendors, food & drink, gifts, etc. Brought our closest
family & friends together for a three day weekend during peak fall foliage in
upstate New York.

· Funniest moment of the day?
After we kissed each other, we wanted to walk down the aisle to an upbeat song. Melissa, our photographer, suggested that we have a private moment together after the ceremony and so we arranged for champagne and some appetizers to be in our room where we could decompress and take some pictures. With Loveland playing, we were making our way to our room at the house and did not have plans to stop and say hello or thank everyone because we knew we would be swept up in conversations making it more difficult to leave. But the guests weren’t having it. We were being chased down by everyone…Brenda’s niece Kylie ran after us crying because she thought she’d never see us again.

· Planner: DIY.

· Photographer: Melissa Schwartz from Organic Photography

· Venue: Legal stuff at Town Hall in Great Barrington, MA. Ceremony
and weekend-long party at Stone Ridge Inn, Stone Ridge NY

* Invitations: Lisa Fu

*Officiant: Emily King – our testimonial and photo are on her site

· Florist: Leis from Hawaiian Lei Company; Mums (because they were “in season”) from a local farm up the road

· Caterer: Bridge Creek Catering where all of the food was locally grown, Cupcakes from Tonnie’s Minis. Beer and wine served during the reception was organic or locally sourced.
Other meals for the weekend provided by Stone Ridge Inn (including an
orchard worth of apple cider!)

· Dress/Suit/Accessories: Rings from Green Karat, Ensembles designed by an Imperial Tailor from Shanghai Tang (purchased while Chris was living inHong Kong), Chris’ skirt made by her seamstress mom with Shanghai Tang fabric, Chris’ shoes from a boutique in Great Barrington, necklaces by Zoe Chicco. Brenda was barefoot (forgot her Birkenstock Gizehs-in golden brown birko flor-at home and realized it only moments before walking down the aisle).

For our gifts to guests, we bought stainless steel compasses that came in a case with our names and the date on the outside of the case as well as on the compass. We love to travel and felt like a compass was a good symbol to convey not only where are we going as a couple, but where are you going (the guest) and to inspire a sense of adventure to travel too!