Joey and I during Cocktail hour on the patio

We arrived at the wedding about half way into Cocktail hour due to the time we taken to do portraits, which wound up being just about the perfect amount of time since many of our guests who were using GPS systems got lost on the way to the reception site. Apparently Newport Beach has two 15th streets that do not connect in any way, and many of guests received messages from their GPS systems about “getting on a ferry”, so we actually arrived around the time most people were still showing up.

Our venues appeal stemmed a lot from its location and the indoor and outdoor nature of the spaces. When guests first walked into the space there is a large indoor room with a big opening that overlooks the harbor and sailboats passing by. We decorated the main room with a variety of jack o’ lanterns, and various other Halloween imagery. At the center of the room there was a black willow tree covered in purple lights with dozens on miniature pumpkins hanging from it (an homage to the Ray Bradbury book The Halloween Tree) at the base of which were picture frames of classic horror films and in front of them were our “Escort Card-Zoos”. Instead of table number we  opted for movie monster names, so each kazoo said the guests name and “You are seated at Frankenstein” etc. and then had an image of the monster itself on the kazoo.  We also had a candy buffet set up with a variety of different apothecary jars filled with candies we love and in our wedding colors.

The mantle of the fire place

There is always one house when your trick or treating that gives out something plastic

The first hour and 15 minutes was set up to be cocktails and hor d’oeuvres, we opted instead of having a full on open bar, to have hosted wine, beer, soft drinks and other non alcoholic beverages and a cash bar for other mixed drinks. Even better was that due to a mix up in pricing early on in our negations with the venue, as a courtesy they allowed us to bring in our own wine, which wound up bringing the total bar tab for the wedding (including the wine we brought) to only about $450 dollars. For cocktail hour foods we had a mashed potato sundae bar, at which guests could make loaded mashed potatoes from a variety of mix ins in little martini glasses. We also had a brushetta station where guests could create their own brushetta from a selection of three different tapenades (Olive, Tomato & Basil, Artichoke).

Mashed Potato Bar

Brushetta

Images by Ashley Janne Photography

After we had finished taking photos with our wedding party and family we did try to make a little time so that we could have a few shots of just us. Too often I had heard horror stories from couple about receiving their photos back and there were zero pictures of just the couple, so while we definitely took less pictures of just the two us we did make time for some, here are a few of our favorites.

This is my favorite

Fixin his tie

Romancin'

All images by Ashley Janne Photography

]]> http://www.soyoureengayged.com/2010/halloween-beach-wedding-part-7-our-portraits/feed/ 2 http://www.soyoureengayged.com/2010/halloween-beach-wedding-part-6-family-and-wedding-party-portraits/ http://www.soyoureengayged.com/2010/halloween-beach-wedding-part-6-family-and-wedding-party-portraits/#comments Fri, 24 Dec 2010 19:25:07 +0000 Derek http://www.soyoureengayged.com/?p=21412 After the wedding ceremony we headed down to the beach to take a variety of portraits with our family and wedding party. This was a nice way of getting the party vibe started since we just goofed off for the most part. It also gave us an opportunity to acknowledge each member of our wedding party individually for being an incredible asset to our special day. Anyways here are some of our favorites from the shoot:

Our wedding party and officiant with bouquets created by my mom

Our Joined Families

If you got it flaunt it

Joey and Brooke have a toatally legitimate (pretend) band called the Vodka Tonics, so natually a band photo had to be taken

Joey and Kelley

Joey and his Maid Of Honor Lindsay are pretty thug

The Married Friends Club

Joey and Lara

Our Officants Cleavage was a topic of conversation obviously

The Best Women EVER

It was a Halloween wedding we had to take at least one goth photo

My Family and I

Joey and his Family

All images by Ashley Jane Photography

The Ceremony

After the incredibly stressful morning and set up time, by the time I arrived at the beach for the wedding I was totally frazzled. I was beyond nervous something else was going to go wrong and that the whole event would end up a disaster (again, this was so silly in hindsight).

We did encounter one snag but it was a minor one, our initial plan was to have the ceremony down on the beach ontop of the sea rocks, I was informed by the Orange County parks department that in that scenario no permits were needed for our event, unless we had a professional film crew coming (which we did not). But when we had to change the ceremony site at the last minute to accommodate the needs of our guests we moved it to one of the parks overlooking the beach, which had its own set of permit restrictions. A local who was unhappy that an event was taking place there had called the parks department, and a ranger came to inform us that what we were doing was illegal… however the ranger said we could go ahead but to please make sure we obtain proper permits in the future.

Joey in his hiding spot with his Maid of Honor, he was pretty nervous as you can see

So Joey and our wedding parties reported to our separate pre-ceremony stair cases, and we both had little nervous attacks, haha. I think mine might have been worse than his, but my mother came over to meet me so she could walk me down the aisle, and in the way only a mother can she instantly calmed me down by focusing on how proud she was and how exciting this all was and that it was finally happening. It was one of my favorite moments from the day.

My music teacher and long time family friend Annabelle prefaced the wedding by playing “The Prayer” by Andrea Bocelli on violin, and then she began playing the processional, “33″ by The Smashing Pumpkins. The processional went as follows:

Our Officiant and High Priestess Glamadu Michelle

Joey, his sister and Mom

Joeys Groomsmaids

Joeys Maid of Honor

My Groomsmaids

My Maids of Honor

My Mother and I

Long time friend and instructor Annabelle playing "33" by The Smashing Pumpkins

Joey and his family walking down the aisle

My mom and I walking down the aisle

Once we were in our places our officiant began with a intro and welcoming words, and then thoughts about love and its importance. We then had a remembrance for Joey’s father. Then one of Joey’s groomsmaids Kelley gave a reading of one our favorite children’s books “I Like You” by Sandol Stoddard Warburg (You can read it here). Which resulted in a whole lot of crying… a whole lot.

Then we began a chuppah ceremony, for our chuppah ceremony we built our own out of sticks and Indian purple silk that shimmered orange in the sunlight. We had family members support each of the four poles as they had laid the foundation for our ability to love and the home we were creating. Each family member was then asked to give a declaration of support which went something like this

“Do you promise to support Joey and Derek in their marriage, to offer advice when needed, to guide them through crisis and welcome them no longer as individuals but as a unit into your families”

“We do”

This was really nice because it felt like our families were rallying around us as a couple. Then we began our vows which we wrote ourselves. Our guests all commented that this was their favorite part of the day. They are too long to write here but Joey’s vows were the single most amazing, beautiful and romantic moment of my life so far. They were swoon-worthy to THE MAX.

Wiping away some tears during the reading

The wind caught the chuppah as it opened and it was a thrilling moment

The wedding overlooking Newport Bay

Once our vows were done we had a ring exchange, we did the typical mistake of putting the rings on the wrong hand. After the rings were on in another moment I loved our officiant went to do our proclamation of marriage and when she reached the “By the power invested in me” part she sort of mumbled “Universal Life Church” and then exclaimed loudly and proudly “AND THE EARTH AND THE STARS AND THE UNIVERSE” which made everyone laugh.  Then we kissed (duh!) and Joey was supposed to smash a glass but we forgot to bring it! Oops! Then in a roar of applause from our friends and family (and at this point probably 20 non-invited yet still awesomely supportive onlookers) we had our recessional to “God Only Knows” by the Beach Boys.

Exchanging rings

The Kiss

God Only Knows What I'd Be Without You...

Out of the whole day the ceremony was my favorite part, which is seems like it obviously should be, but so much of the planning process is about the reception it gets lost in muddle. Once I saw Joey’s face at the end of the aisle any worries I had and stress I had been dealing with vanished. Its an AMAZING feeling that I encourage all of you to cherish, its like having the weight of the world taken off your shoulders and a flood of love an affection take its place.

All images by Ashley Jane Photography

The Coin

After the chaos that had been setting up and my emotional breakdown I was raw, but getting ready ended up being the fun that it should have been. My crew snacked on leftover cupcakes from the bachelor party and listened to ridiculous pop music (I cant remember who by but the lyrics were raunchy). My experience definitely wasn’t one of more relaxed prewedding stories, I ran all over the hotel making sure various things were getting done, which again in hindsight was silly. Still, it was nice to have a slightly less stressful period of time before things kicked off. One of the more awesome moments came when my cousin Michelle gave me two coins, one was a dime for Joey to put in his shoe (a coin in your shoe on your wedding day is supposed to be good luck), the other was a coin that was my great grandmothers and had been worn by many Noel Family Brides in their shoes. It was the most incredible something old, and I was deeply moved by the gesture.

My Wedding Traditions

Something Old: The aforementioned coin

Something New: My Neon Orange Chuck Taylor All Star Converse

Something Borrowed: My fathers tie clip and belt

Something Blue: I wrote Joey’s name in blue ink on the heels of my shoes

Joey’s Traditions

Something Old: His fathers money clip

Something New: His neon green Chuck Taylor All Star Converse

Something Borrowed: A Courtney Love Pin

Something Blue: Underwear

Maid of Honor lacing up (Photo by Ashley Janne Photography)

Tunes (Photo by Ashley Janne Photography)

my incredible boutonnière created by my Mom (Photo by Ashley Janne Photography)

Read More Halloween Beach Wedding Recaps:

Part 1: Getting There, Rain and Rehearsal

Part 2:  Taco Party Rehearsal Dinner and Bachelor Parties

Part 3:  Setting Up and My Wedding Breakdown

When Joey and I first started courting each other (not even dating) we did as so many socially awkward people do, through mix tapes. My first mix for Joey was actually a concept album with a back story that flowed from song to song, and I called it “Songs for My Socialite”. Throughout our relationship Ive released sequels on various milestones, but it had been awhile since I had done one. Since Joey and I had our eyes on frugality we made a no wedding gifts to each other rule, unless it didn’t cost us anything to make. So I suprised Joey with “Songs for My Socialite Spouse”, which featured covers of songs about weddings, autumn, New York, and general lovey dovey stuff. I also designed cover art which featured two mummies cuddling.

As I was leaving for the reception hall to set up one of my in-laws stopped me in the hallway to say “You know its supposed to rain today…”. I actually did know, as you can see in my past recaps everybody kind of knew but the forecast predicted no rain till late that evening. So I put on my bravery shorts and pressed on. FYI Readers, That sentence could be considered foreshadowing…

I feel its important to preface this next part by saying my venue was lovely, affordable, helpful, and I was very happy overall with it, and any unpleasantness that may have gone down has since been remedied in full and will never happen to another couple that has a wedding there. That being said…

Our venue had given us free reign of our space for the whole morning before our 4pm reception to decorate which is very rare to find in most venues, they told us that we could begin setting up at 8am, which was terrific. So we arrived at 8:25 ish only to find that no one was there to let us in, so we contacted our event planner and initially received no response. My mother being one of those go getters of the world actually found a janitor at the back door of the building and got us in by 8:45.

So we began setting up all of our decorations, and at about 10am our event planner showed up, in fact so did the planners for the other events they had booked within spitting distance of our space. My stress factor was pretty high already, from both not sleeping enough and a number of things going wrong at the start, and knowing that there was no an additional event going on one room over with a very loud band did not help matters. I also got overstimulated from giving out directions and having my name said entirely too often. However I pressed forward

Setting up the favors table (photo by Brooke Jensen)

Our event planner sauntered in (in shorts and a baseball cap, very wedding apropos), and told my parents that due to a recent renovation they had done on the bottoms of their formal dining chairs we would be using plastic patio chairs for our seating instead so they wouldn’t get damaged. Now I don’t mind plastic patio chairs, it really wouldn’t be the end of the world to have plastic chairs. However in the diagrams we had sent our planner we had 10 people at each table and the arm rests on the patio chairs only allowed for 7 to sit at each. So his solution was to add more tables, which is great, but if you only have 7 tablecloths, 7 centerpieces and a PAINSTAKINGLY crafted seating chart and escort card system, that isn’t a viable option, so my parents didn’t budge and they held them to their contracted agreements (on more than just this chair issue, but thats another story). So he switched gears… he decided to try talking to me.

At this point a number of people have come to me and asked me what I was going to do if it rained, and given the circumstances I was pretty much near panic attack about the whole thing. So I turn around from handling a lighting issue only to be grabbed by the shoulders by the event planner saying in the most serious and doom inducing tone ever spoken in Orange County “IT IS GOING TO RAIN, WHAT IS YOUR PLAN B?”. My heart fell out of my stomach and wanted to hurl, I stuttered something about how the forecast said it wouldn’t rain till late. His response was “MY FORECAST SAYS ITS GOING TO RAIN AT FOUR. WHAT IS YOUR PLAN B?”. The tears started welling up in my eyes and I pointed him in the direction of my parents while I excused myself to go take a walk. Just a sidenote here, that wedding planner no longer works there, and the new event planner Alex, assisted us a little that day and is phenomenal, so readers should not write this venue off.

*I later found out that it was all a ploy to get us to move inside (where they had booked another wedding mind you) so the chairs wouldn’t get damaged, AND It did not rain at all the day of my wedding, so I was also fibbed too about that 4pm forecast *

I walked about half a block and broke down and called Joey. Wedding rules be damned, I needed my husband right then. This was my epic wedding breakdown, I did not go bridezilla and get rude with anyone, and I didnt throw a tantrum but I did have a sobbing mess of a conversation with Joey. It went something like this…

ME: AND.THEN.HE.SAID*SNIFFSOBB*THAT.HIS.FORECAST*SNIFFSOBB*4!*SOBBSNIFF*RAIN! RAIN! WHAT *Incoherent sobbing* I mean what are we gonna do Joey!

JOEY: well… were gonna go and get married in the rain I guess. I mean as long as I get to marry you, who cares…

ME: … *sniff* …   …yeah. You’re right. How is it you know exactly what to say?

JOEY: cause I love you.

So I went back in and my mom informed me that my Dad had gone to bat for me, he had worked it all out and the venue had pop up tent things they were putting up over the tables to protect them (why those weren’t mentioned earlier? I don’t know). The problem was solved, we would use the fine dining chairs. Everything would work out. My parents rule.

In hindsight it all seems so silly to me, but I know that all of this was a product of lack of sleep, surplus of stress and inadequate amounts of time with my spouse. Also eating something might have helped. I stopped on my way back to the hotel for a McDonalds $1 Chicken Sandwich, and nothing has ever tasted more delicious or made a bigger improvement in my mood so rapidly.

More Wedding Recaps :

Part 1: Getting There, Rain and Rehearsal

Part 2:  Taco Party Rehearsal Dinner and Bachelor Parties

Friends and Family around the Fire Pit (Photo by Ashley Janne Photography)

After the rehearsal everybody went back to their rooms and threw on their warmest duds and we headed over to the hotel’s pool and barbecue area which we had rented out for the evening. It was forecast to rain but we got lucky and there was merely a light mist but we had plenty of blankets and a fire pit on hand for those who were chilly. My cousin Michelle, her wife Jennifer (the same ladies who played a large roll in throwing our Vintage Wedding Shower) and my dad had prepared an awesome Mexican taco bar, with great beer and badass margaritas.

Me and My friend Stoober at the Rehearsal Dinner (Photo by Ashley Janne Photography)

Heres the deal Joey and I, love us some tacos. The entire Mexican food genre brings me nothing but great joy and these were no exception. My dad had grilled up an insane amount of carne asada and chicken, whilst my cousins had made homemade salsa, amazing vegan Spanish rice and beans and of course their signature margartias. The food was BEYOND delicious and everyone really seemed to enjoy it.

Not content to  allow the evening to go completely smoothly and without public embarrassment and injury. Whilst everyone was sitting down for dinner I had grabbed a chair from another table, and while I was pulling it out Joey thought I was being chivalrous and pulling it out for him and before I had figured out what was happening I had pulled a chair out from underneath my future husband and he landed flat on his butt. I FELT SO AWFUL! But he was laughing so I knew right away he wasn’t too hurt, it instantly loosened everybody up though, especially Joey’s sister who took way to much joy in seeing him fall. Haha.

Joey and his Groomsmaid Leanne (Photo by Ashley Janne Photography)

If you’re considering skipping the rehearsal dinner or making it more intimate by having it be only immediate family and wedding party, My suggestion is to reconsider. By planning a lower cost dinner it was easier for us to invite more family and in doing so we got to see a lot more of our out of town guests for longer periods of time which was nice since we didn’t see much of anyone for to long on our wedding day. Post tacos we had batches of cookies and S’MORE fixings for the fire pit. Something about S’MORES just brings people together in mutual love and nostalgia.

Our Groomsmaid Brooke and her son Hayden playing at the the dinner (Photo by Ashley Janne Photography)

After Dinner, Joey and I had separate “Bachelor Parties” and sleepovers with our wedding parties. Both of us elected for more G-Rated affairs, my group went out for drinks at the Cheesecake Factory. Which resulted in much hilarity, and a beautifully sung slow jam about the human body, after drinks we caught a viewing of “Let Me In” in honor of my fondness for horror films. Which was a fantastic movie, BUT SO SAD. After that we headed back to the hotel where we watched TV, ate my favorite cupcakes from Sprinkles. and laughed and chatted into the wee hours (such a mistake in hindsight). As for Joey, his maid of honor has recently won a big jackpot here in Vegas and she purchased tickets for his whole group to go to Disneyland for the evening, they too were out into the wee hours of the morning.

Joey and 3/4s of his girls infront of the Giant Mickey O'Latern at Disneyland (Photo by Brooke Jensen)

Takin control like a PRO at Rehearsal... or a stressed crazy person. Its a fine line. (Photo by Brooke Jensen)

So it had originally been the plan to do a big caravan type situation to drive down to California but the variety of problems that arose from trying to make that happen were to say the least, epic. So Joey and I ended up driving down in a separate cars with my parents. This was actually kind of nice because it meant I got to have a little bit of bonding time with my mom on the drive down. Also, Joey and I had been planning on spending one night apart before our wedding and this way way we would actually have 3 apart, which means all the more swoony and romantic we would be when finally were united. This was actually a bad idea, because as the weekend went on and things got more stressful, we didn’t have each other for direct support line unless it was by phone. So friends out there in blog world… don’t do that. Haha.

You may be asking yourself what was so stressful, well there were a number (a large number) of various issues that arose that weekend, all of which in hindsight were easily solvable and unimportant, except for one which was weighing heavily on everybody (except Joey, that cool cucumber). The Weather. This entire weekend was planned outside, and up to that weekend I had been sort of nonchalant about rain. I actually love the rain, and prefer an overcast day to a sunny one. I kept saying that if it rained we’d all use umbrellas, and we’d still have a great time. But when faced with the actual prospect of it on multiple occasions, with low sleep and blood sugar levels, it ended up being a major issue. However I saved my big rain freak out for later (stay tuned!)

Joey and his family with our Officiant Michelle at Rehearsal (Photo by: Brooke Jensen)

On  Saturday afternoon, our wedding party descended upon Orange County, checked into our hotel compound and then headed to Corona Del Mar State Beach for the rehearsal. Once we arrived, we realized that our original planned location on top of the rocks was not going to work for our elderly guests so we changed the location to a park on top of the cliffs, looking over the beach, which logistically made a lot more sense. We briefly ran through how the ceremony was going to play out, but we tried to keep it as brief as possible since it was a very chilly October evening by the ocean, and there were the ever present rain clouds looming.

Our FANTASTIC officiant did a good job of keeping things light and breezy and making people laugh in spite of some serious chills and obvious stress factors. Once we made sure everybody felt comfortable with the procession and placement, we hustled back to the wedding compound (hotel) for the rehearsal dinner.

Photo by Ashley Janne Photography

On October 17th, 2010, Joey and I were married in Corona Del Mar, California. I’m still conjuring up the words to give this incredible day justice. It was above and beyond what I had dreamed and totally different in every way from what I had expected. I have never in my entire life felt more loved and supported. Its all such a whirlwind in hindsight and it went by all too quickly, but the memories are fantastic and I look forward to sharing them with you in detail. I’m waiting on the bulk of my photographs to arrive but for now enjoy this preview.

Photo by Ashley Janne Photography

Photos by Ashley Janne Photography

Photo by Ashley Janne Photography

Photo by Ashley Janne Photography

Photo by Ashley Janne Photography

]]> http://www.soyoureengayged.com/2010/halloween-beach-wedding-preview/feed/ 2 http://www.soyoureengayged.com/2010/advice-for-crazier-times-towards-the-end-of-your-planning/ http://www.soyoureengayged.com/2010/advice-for-crazier-times-towards-the-end-of-your-planning/#comments Thu, 14 Oct 2010 14:45:41 +0000 Derek http://www.soyoureengayged.com/?p=19717

Well the wedding is just a few days away, and the planning has been an insane whirlwind for the last year and half. And boy, will it be a relief when this is all said and done! In our epic engagement and planning period I’ve learned a few things already. So before I seal the deal I thought I share some of the stuff I’ve learned so far.

• Don’t be afraid to have strong opinions: Whilst never being rude, pushy, or devaluing another persons ideas. I’m not referring so much to your partner here, as you and your partner should always compromise on a mutual vision. I mean this more towards any family or friends who step up to the plate to help you. You run the risk of being called a “zilla” (groom or bride) if you get to pushy, but if you always act from a point of kindness and encourage the aspects of the idea you like as opposed to shooting down, you’ll go much further.

• When something stops being fun, switch gears to a funner aspect of planning: This goes out to all you DIY’ers out there, often our big detailed DIY projects start out being fun and end up frustrating, overwhelming, and tedious. For me it was our personalized place cards with favorite quotations, when I got bored or annoyed with the project, I would step away from it and instead focus on planing something for the honeymoon, or wedding gift shopping. Not every part of the process is fun all the time and its good to get away from it, which leads me to…

• For love of all that is good, plan yourself a day off in the week before the big event: I’m currently learning this one the hard way. Brian wrote a great post about this awhile back! The week before your wedding will be a little hectic, no matter how much you have done or how together you’ve got your affairs. Crazyness just happens. Last minute RSVPS fly in, people invite themselves, everybody needs you as a couple to be somewhere or do something. Plus for those that are not independently wealthy you actually have to work a real job during that time. Schedule an extra day (and don’t tell anyone) for you and your partner to just be off work and enjoy each other.  I know we wish we had!

• Take care of your fiancée: If and When things do eventually get stressful, remember that your partner is stressing too. Remember to show them the extra kindness and affection you would if this stress wasn’t shared. Don’t merely empathize but comfort them as you normally would. This is a department both Joey and I lost track of in our cloud of wedding stress, and then all of sudden it occurred to me that whilst I had been sharing the weight of the stress, I hadn’t taken the extra time to comfort him. When I did take a minute to not only acknowledge that he was flailing but to hug him and hold him we both sort of popped out of the stress fog and realized…

• Everything will be alright: Okay so I don’t really know that everything for my wedding day is going to pan out as I planned. But I do know after the day is over and the decorations are all cleaned up. Even if everyone gets lost, even if there is no food, even if every single thing breaks… Joey and I will have a wonderful set of memories and an exciting future to look forward to. Never forget no matter how intense things get that its only one day and when its over your life will go on and you’ll have an awesome new travel companion. Love is the reason for all the chaos and thats the reason its all worth it.