I have to be honest, I have an aversion to white colored objects. Not because of hating the color white but I’m just so clumsy that white just doesn’t stay so white around me for that long. So, I’m just not a big fan and I don’t want to wear it when I get married. I don’t want to wear off-white, ivory or any shade that is a knock off of white – I really don’t want anything to do with it.
Even the idea of wearing black doesn’t suit me so well, I just want to wear something colorful. Like burgundy or blue or…oh, I dunno…chartreuse. I just want something that shouts what I’m all about and try as everyone might, a white dress is not what I keep envisioning. I might change my mind but so far it hasn’t happened. I love, LOVE color. I enjoy expressing myself and I’ve always felt that weddings should be a reflection of you as a couple not what society makes you believe that you should want.
Now I’m not knocking those who want or chose to wear white – I’m just saying that it isn’t for me. I haven’t really thought about my wedding until lately but even now, white is just not screaming out at me but as we all know that is all that is being shoved down our throats. White dresses to the floor, to your knee, in lace, in tacky taffeta (apologies to the taffeta lovers) and it is really leaving me feeling defeated already and I haven’t officially started to look for dresses. I have talked to my partner and she is much more traditional than me and of course wants us both to wear white, my best friend (and soon to be maid of honor) wants me to wear white or a variation of it but feels that if I really need color maybe I can find a white dress trimmed in another color, which I guess could be quite pretty. Even though I don’t have the desire to wear white, I respect that they both want me to. I was talking to my girlfriend and she was saying that traditionally that is what is done and it is not about wearing white but this is the only time where it is perfectly acceptable to wear that color – that she could always wear a colored dress to any gathering but not so much a white one. Which was food for thought for me but it still doesn’t negate the clumsy factor in my case. I am the one who spills whole bowls of soup across tables more times than I’d like to admit and my saving grace is that I am usually wearing colors that hide that fairly well but white?? There is no hiding that, there is no hiding anything.
Even though I heard what she had to say, I’m still not totally convinced. Even though, I will have to compromise in some type of way, I’m sure…maybe…possibly. Is there anyone out there that understands my plight? Did you not wear white or did you find a suitable compromise? If so, what was it? Also, if you have any places where I could go to look for non-white wedding dresses, please feel free to help because wedding dress shopping is already stressing me out!
Just say no to white. I’ve never wanted to wear a white dress and now I’m 40 and getting ‘gay’ married and wearing white just seems “silly” IMHO, I realize. I’m feminine and wearing a pretty frouffy 1950s Vintage party dress, but it’s not white. It’s the one day of your life when you should be celebrated for who you truly are. I say celebrate in the color that makes you feel most like yourself.
How about a white “wedding” dress and a kick-butt NOT white “reception” dress? If it’s in the budget, I think that would make everyone happy! (And you only have to keep from spilling stuff on the white dress for a little while!!!!!)
I was pointed to this awesome site that has dresses in tons of fun colors http://www.ariadress.com – All sizes (woo hoo!!!) including plus size and petite and all dresses are made in the USA and under $500. Lots of options for mix and match styles and colors. From what I can tell (and the reviews I’ve read) their “try-it on” program is great for those who don’t live by one of their physical stores.
I’m personally looking at the bridesmaid collection for my dress. I don’t see myself wearing white either :) Good luck!
My vote is to go hit up a bridesmaid shop. I found my wedding dress there and I saved a ton of money and was able to try on brightly colored dresses. I say wear what makes you happy. I ended up buying an off white dress, so that I can dye it later and wear it again. Always a practical femme, what can I say??
I am also prone to spilling food and other various messy things on my clothing, so share in your aversion to white. I will still most likely wear white on my wedding, but I am not a color-lover like yourself. I see nothing wrong with wanting to wear color (a friend of mine recently wore a gorgeous cobalt blue gown to her wedding) but if you want to find some middle ground- perhaps you could go with the white/white with color trim gown and keep a beautiful bridesmaid(ish) dress on standby that really speaks to your personality. Or you could wear the white to the ceremony and switch into some color for the reception. Either way, theres gotta be some room for compromise :)
I was in this same predicament until I found Aria Dresses (google for the exact website.) They have a ton of georgous colors for dresses and all sorts of sizes!
I created a mosaic to auto post on my blog on wednesday of all colored wedding dresses! You should check it out! 11am!
I fully intend to go with a purple wedding dress! I had the traditional (married to a man the first time) white dress and this time I want to be more… ME!
You can get bridesmaids dresses in just about any style and color, for LOADS less $ than a “wedding dress”, and it will still look like a wedding dress. With my first marriage I couldn’t afford a $$$$ dress, so I went with an off-white strapless gown from Jim Hjelm (check his stuff out, it’s really nice quality and lots of colors and styoles). At the time it was perfect for me since I didn’t want lace/beads/train.
Thanks everyone! I know I have to start thinking about this. I figure I’ll go look at traditional dresses and some bridesmaid dresses and figure out what will work for me. I have an aversion to dress shopping but I wear skirts and heels basically everyday, go figure. I will check out the sites mentioned.
I also love to hear that brides are wearing colors that are outside of tradition!
@xgirl – purple sounds absolutely amazing, I would love to see it!
@Heather & Brandy – That is an idea. I feel the sooner I’m out the white, the better. I went out to eat on Sunday and ended up spilling miso soup all over the table and that happens more than I’d like. So buying two dresses (if in the budget) wouldn’t be a bad idea.
@Annie – Love the vintage frock idea. I am leaning more towards vintage – I just don’t know, there are so many options! I love your confidence though, so rock on lady!
Even though I’m wearing white, I can totally relate. I love colorful wedding dresses! And, it was hard to decide whether I wanted to follow tradition. As far as shopping tips, Erica and I both had success with Jenny Yoo bridesmaid dresses. I love the green dress I got from them for our city hall ceremony, and I especially love that I can wear it again and again.
Hey Cynthia girl…I completely understand your clumsiness…everything lands on my chest lol I think the most important thing to remember when trying to find something to wear on your big day is to go with what makes you truly feel beautiful, sexy, vibrant, etc. No matter what the style or color!
Neither my wife nor I wore white at our wedding. I wore pewter grey and my wife wore red. My dress was Demetrios, and my wife’s was Allure. Both have lines that come in a few colors. Maggie Sottero, Eden Bridal, and Raylia also have some in colors.
i don’t know if it will make your white-dress-supporters feel better or not, but there are plenty of traditional wedding dress options that are not white – it just depends which traditions you look at. you could go old-fashioned and wear blue, the “virginal” color for long before white took that over, or go with red which is traditional in india and vietnam, and i’m sure if you look there are other traditions to follow as well. not that you have to, of course.
as for finding a colorful dress, i would certainly go the non-wedding dress direction: bridesmaid, prom, or evening gowns. i’m going that route for simplicity and price even though i do want whitish.
Excellent feedback everyone!
@lady brett – You know, I never thought about that. I will research traditions and see what I find. I do like the idea of wearing a blue dress for some reason.