Dress Confession
I have a guilty admission: I found the dress of my dreams in 15 minutes. I didn’t mean to – I wasn’t even looking, I swear. I was fully committed to devoting hours upon stressful, uncertain, self-doubting, non-committal hours to the hunt for my perfect wedding dress… and instead I found it on my lunch break.
The Flashback:
I work in the fashion district of Toronto, with more bridal shops within a 3 block radius than I can count. So while I began this process certain that I wouldn’t be wearing a traditional wedding gown, the idea of it has actually been physically unavoidable. I’ll admit to initially having conflicting emotions about what to wear…. I’m already legally married and, of course, gay as the day is long, so I was unsure if the traditional white gown was right for me. But I still found myself daydreaming about the perfect white dress, and scouring the internet for something that matched the gown I (sheepishly) envisioned myself in. So on a whim, on the way back to work from lunch, I dropped into a bridal shop to maybe book an appointment for later in the week. Maybe.
The Find:
The ever-so-helpful (read: ever-so-pushy) woman at the store informed me that they did not require appointments, I had waited far too long to start the dress-shopping process, and that 20 minutes on your lunch break was plenty of time to try on a few dresses. I was ushered upstairs and grilled on what I wanted. I explained I wanted a full skirt, fitted bodice with rushing, and preferably a pleated crumb-catcher – absolutely no lace, no beading. I was skeptical that she would happen to have on hand exactly the dress I had been imagining for months but been unable to find online or in magazines, and my skepticism was reinforced by the two lacy and beaded numbers she pulled off the rack first. Then she said, “Oh! Wait, this is the one you wanted” and handed me… the one I wanted. It was everything I had daydreamed about: it was an out-of-control puff-fest, equal parts princess and old-Hollywood glamour, so simple, elegant, and ridiculously feminine. All worries about the appropriateness of a big white gown were out the window, because I didn’t want to feel anything other than as good as I felt in that dress. The princess in me felt swept away, and the no-fuss low-maintenance gal in me was won over by the ease (15 minutes!) with which my dream had become a reality.
The Fallout:
Of course, I dragged a friend back to the shop with me the next day so I could be sure I hadn’t lost my mind. She assuaged my fears, told me I looked amazing, and teared up a little… just as a faithful bridesmaid should. I LOVE my dress, and know it’s “The One”, but I’ve still managed to get myself worked up about not having invested enough bride-time in my dress hunt: “Shouldn’t I have let myself enjoy the process more? Shouldn’t I have spent more time finding dresses I didn’t like so I can appreciate the right one? Shouldn’t I be feeling guilty that I found exactly what I wanted without any sweat and tears and angst?” Really, my ability to over-analyze is astounding. I wouldn’t call them regrets, but these thoughts have made me realize that I need to appreciate the small details of putting this event together. Now that one of the major tasks is out of the way, I can spend more quality time in doing those projects that will make our wedding personal and special. And giving over to something I really wanted after having tried to convince myself I “shouldn’t” want it, has changed my attitude towards the whole wedding – I’m a lot more relaxed, a lot more confident in my choices, and a lot more at ease with simply enjoying the more traditional aspects of this process and making them my own.
I love your dress! Like you, I’m also into really simple, pleated dresses. I think it’s awesome that you went with your gut, and got your dress so fast. Sometimes things just fall into place like that.
You look so phenomenal in that dress. Of course you knew right away. And DO NOT worry about missing out on dress hunting — it can get really stressful and you just get to bypass all of that. Instead spend all that time you would have spent dress hunting, doing some serious shoe hunting. I found it harder to find the right shoes (and I was never really happy with the shoes I wore). Or necklace hunting. Or headpiece hunting. Don’t worry — there are ENDLESS accessories you still get to hunt for!
You look fab, girl.
Don’t feel guilty–I found mine in about 30 mins, and it was the one the owner of the store pulled off the rack! And Ms. Grrrl is right, the accessories finding can be endless!
It is beautiful on you and I love the direction of the waist ruching. As someone who is being very picky, be happy you found a dress. The shoppping part isn’t all it is cracked up to be. Since when did stripping in front of mulitple strangers get to be fun?
Very lovely dress! If you did that on your lunch hour, your wedding should be beautiful as well! A great choice in a short amont of time.
Oh, man, there are so many other things with wedding planning that will drive you batty – just be happy that this one part is actually easy!