image by Lara Swanson
Some would think that having a wedding with two brides would mean two families fighting over who gets to pay the bill. While this is not my reality, I like to think that there is a lucky couple out there in such a situation. Most of the money for our event came from Nicole’s mother who had inherited some money from the passing of her father, and wanted to help us have a nice ceremony. Before she insisted on giving us some money we were unsure how we were going to afford a ceremony at all. My parents are very accepting of Nicole and my relationship, but I had always assumed that no matter who I married I would most likely be paying for my own wedding. So we took the money from Nicole’s mom, started a savings plan for the rest, and I took on some freelance design jobs to help flesh out our budget. All-in-all the budget for our ceremony and reception is $10,000. That’s a third of what the average wedding in America costs. So I knew it was going to be a challenge to get the ceremony we dreamed of while living in such an expensive part of the country.
We really wanted to have our ceremony on the beach since that is where we had our first kiss (aw!) but most of the resorts started at $100 a head. That was almost our whole budget right there!! So we decided to look into Asbury Park since it is a very gay friendly area and is still up-and-coming. We found a reception site there that we loved and since the area is being revitalized the prices were very reasonable, and they took care of the beach ceremony as well! It was perfect! Unfortunately we didn’t have enough guests to meet their minimums for an evening reception so we compromised and decided on a lunch reception which wound up bringing our per head cost down by half what the evening reception would have cost. We are also saving on the bar costs by not paying per head but paying per drink since people will be less likely to drink their faces off so early in the day. We still really wanted to have something fun at night so we are inviting guests to spend the night in asbury with us and having a bonfire on the beach after some bowling at the cutest retro bowling alley.
Another way we are cutting corners is by crafting a lot of the decorations. Every bouquet, centerpiece, and boutineer will be handmade (by me) out of paper. Tissue paper is so much cheaper than roses, and I really don’t mind making all the flowers because its fun! I am also designing our own invites and silk screening them at home. While I feel a little stressed with the sheer number of DIY projects I have taken on it has greatly reduced the cost of decorating the event space.
Wardrobe was one area that we had to be very careful with since we are both wearing dresses for the ceremony. We set a budget of $1000 for both dresses and the undergarments. We didn’t have any trouble staying within that budget with the prices at david’s bridal. It doesn’t make sense to me to spend a ton of money on a dress you will only wear for one day so I didn’t mind keeping within our set amount.
The only area that we totally splurged and broke the budget was with the music. We had budgeted for a DJ but then fell head over heels for a jazz band, and just HAD to have them. My dad offered to pay for part of the band which helped bring it closer to what we had budgeted. I am so excited to have a live band play at our reception!
What is the one big thing you splurged on for your ceremony?
Just like you too, a live band will be our big splurge! A DJ would have worked, especially with multiple DJ friends on our guest list, but Ginger and I are so excited about a live band that can bring a little bit of New Orleans to our MD wedding. Dancing to the band is one of those wedding moments I’m so excited about!