I’ve been contemplating for awhile now what I’d like to wear to the wedding, actually its something I have thought about for years… before I even met Joey. I guess some little girls (and fabulous boys) dream of the big poofy dress and veil but there are definitely those little (less fabulous) boys like me who’ve known for a long time what they would like to wear to the big day. I feel like to frequently men’s formal attire is locked into two groups Suits and Tuxedos. Neither of which I find myself identifying with.
My Prom Photo… we posed silly but the reaction is still appropriate
I’ve worn a tuxedo exactly three times in my life: Once on a cruise to celebrate Y2K when I was 15 and I thought it would be snazzy to wear zoot suit tux. It wasn’t. Once to my Senior Prom, it was an ill-fitting baby blue vested black tux with tails which I thought would add a sense of personal flair. It didn’t. And the last was a classic tuxedo I wore in my high school production of 42nd Street, which was supposed to make our awkward chorus of teenage boys seem dashing. It was a good try. The point is I’ve never liked the way I looked or felt in tuxedo, they simply don’t suit me. My good-natured mother has been nudging (occasionally shoving) me to wear a tux on my wedding, and both parents have commented that I’ll regret it if I don’t. But is it crazy to say I don’t think I will, so long and I feel my most handsome that day. Plus if we want to talk about regrets we could talk about the powder blue ultra 70′s with ruffles and tinted sunglasses number my Dad wore to his wedding. Yes its as amazing and funny as you’re imagining.
The other classic option is a suit, which if you ask me is essentially a de-glorified tuxedo. However I have wore suits many times in my life and almost always feel handsome and smartly dressed. I mentioned earlier that some little boys know what they want to wear to they’re wedding… well for me it was a chocolate brown corduroy suit with a crushed red velvet vest and black neck tie. In my fantasy the sleeves would have patches on the elbows in a slightly darker suede and I was getting married under a sea of autumn colored trees like an eclectic collegiate from a Wes Anderson movie. Everyone except my wonderful fiancé have cringed in horror at this revelation as though I suggested I’d be wearing baby animal pelts or something. Even as I told my mother I could see the stifled screams of protest behind her eyes. Due to the adverse reaction to this I’ve actually let this one go, if everyone else see’s this as terrible maybe some day I will see what they were talking about. Plus I don’t want my kids to tease me as mercilessly as my brother and I teased my father for his wedding attire.
So where does this leave a guy like me? I certainly don’t want to be underdressed at my wedding as its a hugely important day. But I also don’t want to force myself into the molds of suits or tuxs when neither really feel right for me. Ive been dabbling with something like this in my head but I don’t know yet if its right for me. 
My mother will not approve of the Purple Hair
I personally love a soft gray vest with matching pants. I almost decided on that instead of a dress. However I think the chocolate brown corduroy suit would be great, especially with the the elbow patches. While your parents opinion is important, I think being happy with what you are wearing wins.
you should wear exactly what you want to wear. anyone who ‘cringes in horror’ at that is the totally crazy one. i mean, it’s your wedding day. -yours-. they need to suck it up and let you look exactly how you want. you will look so much better happy in a non-traditional outfit than kind of less than ecstatic in something other people consider ‘appropriate’.
and honestly, brown cordoruy suit, et al. sounds pretty damned great looking to me.
Having been mercilessly teased by my two sons for wearing a powder-blue tux in the early 70s (what can I say we were anti-traditional in those days), I think you should wear what you want to wear. Just be happy because it’s the day you’ll remember, not what you wore. And besides, who knows, maybe you’ll get your own payback. :-)