Hi So You’re Engayged folks,
This is my first blog post, but I’ve been involved behind the scenes in getting this little site together. I’m Natalie, Kelly’s wife, nerdier half, and professional homosexual (not really…but I do have a degree in LGBT Studies). My role on the blog will be to answer questions related to LGBT equality, history, culture, and social movements, as well as to blog about happenings in the LGBT world. When Kelly is your wife, your wedding-planning niche is going to be pretty small, though I did choose my dress, hair, music, and religious elements of the ceremony (more on that later). So I’m going to leave the wedding tips to her, and blog about what I know best. And I’m going to proofread.
Kelly and I are about to make a life-change that, in practical terms, might actually be bigger than our wedding. We, two native Washingtonians, will be headed northwards come August to New Haven, Connecticut where I will spend 6 years hunkered down in a drafty castle at the end of which I will emerge with my PhD in English. I know it doesn’t sound like it, but this is exciting stuff. However, it entails loading 4 rabbits, 4 guinea pigs, and 2 cats into a car and driving for five hours. It also involved moving Kelly’s craft supplies. And learning to drive in real snow.
But one of the most exciting things about this move is that Kelly and I will be able to legalize our marriage, as CT allows same-sex couples equal marriage rights. We’re hoping to do it legally on the first anniversary of our wedding, September 21. And we’re pumped. But we’re also pumped that Yale isn’t attaching Kelly’s health insurance benefits to that piece of paper we’ll get in September. Domestic partnerships, civil unions, and marriages are recognized equally…and allow Kelly not only health insurance but also access to Yale’s gyms (just because you’re skinny, Kelly, doesn’t mean you don’t need to work out), facilities, and FREE classes. This excited me.
I’m a strong believer in marriage equality, and for me, marriage is important for personal and religious reasons. But I’m also for freedom of choice in how we structure our families. Romantic love outside marriage can flourish, and not all familial relationships require romantic love. If things hadn’t worked out between me and Kelly, I’d be all for being an old lady spinster on my porch with my sister. And I’d need health insurance to cover my spinster butt.
So between all the talk of generalist orals, funding, TA-ships, and how to afford good sushi and good coffee as a grad student, I’m gearing up for wedding #2. To the same girl. To make my brother happy, we may have to state-hop and make it legal in as many places as possible. But, for now, we’re excited to be able to “do it” in our new home state.
Hi Natalie! I’m excited to finally read you after following your wedding on your wife’s blog. Congratulations on getting into grad school! (I got my PhD in DC.) Anyway, I look forward to reading more.
This blog looks interesting. I’m looking forward to reading more. My wife and I got married July 2008 in the presence of our newly adopted son. We’ve been together over 25 years so we thought it would just be another conformation of our love. It was so much more than that. Marriage changes things … in a very good way. Everyone deserves to experience it! More power to you both.