When Kelly first told me about her idea for So You’re EnGAYged, I was floored. It was exactly what I’d heard so many same-sex couples yearn for: a wedding resource that directly relates to them, their relationship, and the obstacles that they encounter while planning their wedding.
Repeatedly I see my photography clients struggle to find pro-gay vendors, wrestle with the complex nature of family relations, and essentially start from scratch on how to have a wedding (like the post “What’s in a same-sex wedding ceremony?“). As an ally, there are limits to what I can do to help, but So You’re EnGAYged has created a new opportunity for allies to participate in the journey towards marriage equality.
We’ve had a number of posts on incorporating the fight for marriage equality into weddings (like this one!) and I’ve personally known allies who are wrestling with the same issues. I believe allies can use So You’re EnGAYged as a resource to find help with the same issues that many gay couples are facing while planning their weddings, particularly related to the politics side of gay marriage.
I am also continually impressed with the level of sensitivity and inclusiveness that the non-gay vendors on So You’re EnGAYged’s vendor list exude. It is awesome that allies can also use it as a resource for their weddings – you don’t have to be gay to find value in the dozens of wedding vendors who are pro-gay! During my own wedding planning process, it was important to my husband and me to find vendors who were socially responsible – I wish that this list had been around then!
Similarly, for our vendors, So You’re EnGAYged continues to develop resources to help them be gay-friendly, whether the vendor is a member of the LGBT community or not. We have numerous vendors who are allies and readers of this blog, and I believe So You’re EnGAYged will continue to be an invaluable resource for them as they work with more and more same-sex clients. We’re actually right in the midst of developing a guide for wedding vendors who are working with same-sex couples, and we’re excited about how So You’re EnGAYged is becoming a resource for allies as well as gay couples. As an ally, I’m so proud of what this community has accomplished so far on this site, and I can’t begin to express how excited I am for its future.
When I was first engaged, I was sucked into the world of wedding blogs. Even though everything was beautiful, it still didn’t look like my wedding. It was so wonderful to find a place on the internet where there were other gay and lesbian couples getting married and to see that they had beautiful weddings also. I am so thankful for this website.
Agreed! And the Real Gay Weddings are easily the most-visited part of our site; it’s clear that it’s filling a void that’s very needed. I’m so glad that we’ve got awesome bloggers to write about all of the things leading up to them, too! :)
I have to agree with Ms. Sparrow. Knowing that there’s a place to go where people are planning the same sort of wedding and facing the same kind of problems — it’s a wonderful thing.
Great post! And I’m not just saying that because you linked to one of my entries. It is a really nice summary of what we are doing here and why.
And this post reminded me of one of my newest pet peeves… pro-gay photographers who do not feature a single gay-wedding pic in their online gallery! It was nice of you to remind me that just as I am struggling and learning through this process, so might a vendor. So if any photographers are reading this, add a couple same-sex pics to your gallery. It would really help.